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That’s why I’d like to tell you that I’ve brought my best friend on a journey around the world to meet with other athletes who have come out. What you are experiencing right now is a lack of role models. That’s also where you will find your biggest victories. You visions are about growing as a person.
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New visions and goals will be born and they are not about sports anymore. Your athletic career will be relatively short. Unfortunately, you will never dare to be the true you when you are out training and competing with the national team. After coming out you will do your first-ever eight-meter jump. It will be so much harder than winning the Swedish Championships and competing in the Olympics. Being yourself - freeing yourself - will make you jump far.Ĭoming out will be your biggest challenge in life. Life will show you that it’s exactly that fact. “Be yourself “is not something that you have heard will lead to gold medals.īeing yourself - freeing yourself - will make you jump far. You have learned to follow the formula to be the best. You have also learned the magical sports formula: Be a talent, have high goals, work hard and be the best when it matters. You will try so hard to keep your current image, because you want people to like you and you want to be a top athlete in the future. And you do your best to live up to those expectations. That image contains a lot of unconscious expectations from people around you. You have the label of being “the typical sports guy”. And other people liked that person as well. The reason for your decision is that you like being the person you were before you found out that you are gay. You have decided to never tell anyone that you have fallen in love with guys and not girls. He now works with LGBTQ athletes and others to build inclusion in sports. Peter Häggström was one of the best long jumpers in the world.
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One day you will understand that the reason for this is because there are people who know how to lead, and those who do not. Not from everyone, but from way too many. In the future, you will look for where it’s far from OK to express yourself like that, but unfortunately you will hear that kind of language your whole athletic career. Even if no one knows, your self-image shrinks every time you hear those words. In recent days the gay jokes have felt like machine gun fire pointed right at you. There is a certain tone in their pronunciation (or screams as it usually is), that underlines the fact that a gay person is worth nothing. In school, in the looker room and even among people you define as your friends. You hear the expression ”fucking fag” almost every day. You will have to put your own prejudices aside.
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You will also learn that the toughest football players can be gay and queer. There are many guys and girls who are participating in sports and who are in the closet like you. I can tell that you that you are not alone. You also think that sports guys need to be masculine, self-confident and straight to be successful. Now you believe that you will have to drop out of sports, because you actually think that there is not one single person in the entire world that is gay and good at sports. Or at least, that’s what you were thinking until you understood that you are gay.
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Deep inside you know that it’s track and field you want to go for. You have always seen yourself as a top athlete and are in sports to be the best. You are 13 years old and love sports and have participated in sports for as long as you can remember. You could at least have taken a look at your CD collection and you should have realized a long time ago. Do people know? I smile a little bit at the fact that you have not found out yourself until now. You are wondering if people can tell by your looks. Now you can´t sleep at night and feel that you’re not worth anything at all anymore. Some days ago, you realized what’s going on. I would like to give you some tips along the way, so that you will understand that things will get better. The reason I’m sending you this letter is because I know that you feel like shit right now. The world I live in now is in many ways so much better, but in many aspects, not enough progress has been made. This is how mail is being sent today, 29 years later. It’s an electronic letter and is not sent in an envelope with a stamp.